Into The Light – A Lomi Student’s Journey of Empathy and Love to Expand Beyond Adversity
As the sun rises every morning and brightens the day with light, love and endless possibilities I look within and feel great gratitude for the life I have so far lived. My life has been a gift that has shaped me nourished me and given me great strength of spirit. These gifts others seldom have seen as positive so when they have been gifted with them they have taken them into a spiral and instead of lifting them they have held them down like an unliftable weight which is why I am taking the time to share the gifts within my life so others can see the great beauty within the journey they have had.
My first gift was that of being adopted. I never met my mother or father. I of course journeyed with them during pregnancy but the rest merely a devine thumb print on my soul. In that moment I became a child of the earth. Answerable to the trees and the wind, the rocking of the waves and the knowledge left in the earth by those who have walked before us. This a definite gift for life that went on to protect me and guide me amidst darker times. I did not understand then but it meant that I would never be alone. My second gift was that of seeing the effects of mental illness first hand. My adopted mother had a hysterectomy young and without hormone replacement ended up battling schizophrenia. I grew up thinking that it was normal to be locked in my room and that everyone got a daily beating and were responsible for the hardships of others. There were many trips over the front verandah that left me bruised and sore it was not until I was eight and I woke to a knife being plunged into my back as I slept and there was screaming and commotion that her secret was out and I found out that childhood was not meant to be this way. For me I learnt very young that love is a choice. We should never take it for granted or expect it. It should be respected when it comes and treated with the care it deserves. All that time by myself protected me from growing up and allowed me to continue to dwell in my whimsical world of trees and animals enjoying the bush as I would take to the hills near my home for safety over the next 8 years. All very powerful gifts.
Becoming a single mother of four saw me grow and thrive. The first realization that I was on my own and had these precious lives to support, feed and inspire gave me the drive to carry on as if this was the intended plan. It just made me stronger. It meant that I could not hide behind my fears and I was constantly on show to my kids who were learning from my every choice and action. Onward and upward became my motto and soon I discovered that there was nothing that was not achievable. Their lives and interests and desires became pieces of inspiration for mine and we all began to strengthen and became a force unto ourselves growing strength with every adventure. Every set back became a lesson that would just lead to a greater outcome and eventually I realized we were all raising each other and there before was the grounding network and roots of my home tree had appeared, that I had longed for through out my youth. Together we weathered many storms as we all do and there is never smooth sailing amidst divorce and schooling but we grew from it and together viewed the many sides of human spirit and how feelings of discontent and inner frustration could come out upon others to cause great harm and destruction. This brought my children to a point where they too realized that love is a choice and we can either sit down and let hate consume us and hold onto things and become bitter and resentful or we can look to the sun and earth that are real and constant and feel blessed for what we have and the journey we have had and take these seeds of love to the earth so they can grow for all to enjoy. I really do believe that the things others see as dark are actually beautiful beams of light sent to lift us to places we never thought we could reach. I hope that my children hold this in their hearts and strive to make everyday of their lives a piece of adventure that not only drives them to new horizons but inspires others for the journey too.
By the time I turned 35 I had managed to pay my house off had a thriving company, 150 guitar students, traveled the world teaching with my children, built my own house, and was in a position to watch my children explore the world with love in their hearts and desire to walk on. I realized that we gift ourselves to others and to ourselves and when we do we grow the most beautiful things, our possibilities endless and our ability to add light into others and our own lives unestimatable. My 40’s have brought me even greater gifts and where it will end well who knows.
The greatest gifts in my life have also been my greatest traumas, making my life so much richer and vibrant, gifting me strength and tenacity to go on, giving me a desire and passion for life that just gains intensity with every breath I take. It has given me the strength to climb any mountain I desire to and to see the only limit to my life is myself.
May the love and light of life carry you to unreachable heights. Where there is love there is always adventure to be had.
Sunshine and Smiles Melinda